Its a New Year

It's a new year and a year of opportunities. The past year has seen the biggest stock market sell off and crash since the Great Depression. The price of oil has dropped 65%. And in many places unemployment is high and real estate prices are low. I have had partners dissappoint me and in a few cases betray me. I have witnessed by best friend and her husband endure a year of pain and struggles and shared in their pain as she has fought bravely against her battle with cancer. I've seen my children and grandchildren grow up another year. I've endured through great challenges and had tall mountains to scale in my own businesses. We drilled one dry hole and then drilled again and hit oil in another. My best friends are closer to me and my enemies are farther. I've found someone new that fills my days with many smiles and happy thoughts. And I've had to drive more miles this year, than the past four put together. I've lost 13 pounds of body weight. And I've gained a 111 pounds of happiness. I've been knocked down a few times by opponents, but managed to still pick myself up for another fight.

New Years Eve

I spent this evening without a grand party. Just went to dinner next door at the Tulsa Petroleum Club with some friends and came home and enjoyed some new books I got for Christmas.

I had a chance to meet a new friend and put a face with a story, and . . . yes . . .there is a Tom.

A word of encouragement from my friend

My friends Jerry and Julia are departing on Friday for El Salvador to seek a treatment for the cancer which has attacked her over and over and over.

They received an email from a Pastor friend in Uganda that they emailed on to me. I found the words particularly encouraging to me too. I am facing a large struggle myself and see that I should have a new attitude. Both about Julia's treatment and my own struggle with my partners.

Peter in Uganda wrote:
When a farmer prays and expects rain
He goes out and tills his field.
We expect our faithful God to deliver on
His promises, . . . . so prepare for that.

Book the 'champagne and fine wine',
start preparing the guest list,
take a look at the new clothes,
clean up the house, prepare the lawn arrangements,

make sure the garden is in order,
check out prices for the guest list,
work on the thanksgiving speech....
Faith is being certain, sure that God has heard,
God will keep, God will not fail.

There are no ' mights' in faith...only 'wills'.

The Opening of the Money Jar

On the evening of our "late" Christmas, after the gift giving we once again celebrated our new tradition of giving to all the kids my money in the money jug from the year. It's a large water bottle that throughout the year I put all of my change into. I have started a habit a few years ago of always using a bill to pay for anything. So at the end of every day I have a pocket full of change. Sometimes a few dollars. And now it takes me about a year to almost fill it up. Now and then I might even throw in a dollars, or five, or ten or twenty. Sometimes I even put in rolls of coins that have come out of my vending machines here at the hotel. The jug was so full this year, that it took Kenneth and me both to carry it from the car. This years total was about $2,250.00. We all sat on the floor with Jami having the honor of carving the money . . . which means sticking a knife up in the jar to loosen the coins to fall out. And then after we got it all out on a blanket, we sat and had the task of dividing it into pennies, nickels, dimes, quarters, and even a few dollar coins. The fact that it was over 90% quarters brought a lot of smiles. And then after we had all the coins out, Kenneth was given the task of using chop sticks to get the bills out of the jug.

Two hours later the money was all out and separated and counted and divided up among the kids. Each had brought pillow cases to carry away the "loot". And just as it was last year . . .we all smiled and talked about the vacations that each would use their gift for.

Tomorrow the jug will be back in Tulsa and the process will begin again.

Click here for a short video of the celebration.

Christmas Came late this year

Christmas came a bit late this year for me. Each year, Jami and Emily alternate spending Christmas day with their families, or spending the day with their husband's families. This was the year apart. So we all got together on the Sunday afternoon after Christmas in Fort Worth at their mom's house. Jami and Kenneth and Sophia, and Emily, Bill, Coleton, and Cade, and Katy and their mom . . .and of course Me. Pam was was out commission for the preparations while having to nurse a broken foot back to health but she was able to enjoy it all and watch and see the joy of the children as they opened their gifts.

Everyone was watching the Dallas Cowboys suffer the worst defeat of the year in their last game. And I arrive late after having to stop at JC Penney's and get some new jeans after having spilled coffee on mine during the drive down from Tulsa.

After the game we shared a happy time of gift giving and receiving and laughing and watching the kids glow with delight as they opened each new present. At 19 months this was the first Christmas we all got to watch Sophie actually enjoy the time of tearing paper off.

Christmas December 25, 2008

Since my kids were with in-laws this year, my assistant manager, Debbie McCraw, and I decided to give the front desk staff off today and she and I watched it and took care of the arriving guests.

Jesus is the Reason for the Season. I know that the Secret to getting all I want out of life is in helping others get all that they want.

Later, I will celebrate that non-traditional Christmas day meal at Waffle House with Cheesy Eggs and hash browns. (smiling)

Wuthering Heights

This year brought a few successes. And a few small disappointments. A couple of betrayals. And one Grand failure. One of my favorite books has always been Wuthering Heights. Many don't like it because its such a tale of emotional tragedy. It was . . .and is . . .literature's first dark romantic novel.
It is a tragic story of love scorned and bullying. A man who let adversity turn his heart to stone and in the end was not able to take back Cathy when she realized that he, and he alone was the great love of her life. And tragic for her to spend her whole life, not seeing that a smaller person in life than her was the only one who could fill the void in her heart. In the end, he Heathcliff was left with a cold heart of stone, and his Cathy was left outside the window in the cold begging him to please let her come back in. I hope that I can keep a measure of forgiveness in my heart. And a large portion of Hope. I don't want to become a man with a heart of stone as he did.

The song Wuthering Heights was originally performed by Kate Bush, but my favorite of it is by Hayley Westenra.

Wuthering Heights lyrics

Out On the wiley, windy moors
We'd roll and fall in green
You had a temper, like my jealousy
Too hot, too greedy
How could you leave me
When I needed to possess you?
I hated you, I loved you too

Bad dreams in the night
They told me I was going to lose the fight
Leave behind my wuthering, wuthering
Wuthering Heights

Heathcliff, it's me, Cathy, I've come home
I'm so cold, let me in in-a-your-window
Heathcliff, it's me, Cathy, I've come home
I'm so cold, let me in in-a-your-window

Oh it gets dark, it gets lonely
On the other side from you
I pine alot, I find the lot
Falls through without you
I'm coming back love, cruel Heathcliff
My one dream, my only master

Too long I roam in the night
I'm coming back to his side to put it right
I'm coming home to wuthering, wuthering
Wuthering Heights

Heathcliff, it's me, Cathy, I've come home
I'm so cold, let me in in-a-your-window
Heathcliff, it's me, Cathy, I've come home
I'm so cold, let me in in-a-your-window

Ooh let me have it, let me grab your soul away
Ooh let me have it, let me grab your soul away
You know it's me, Cathy

Heathcliff, it's me, Cathy come home
I'm so cold, let me in in-a-your-window
Heathcliff, it's me, Cathy come home
I'm so cold, let me in in-a-your-window
Heathcliff, it's me, Cathy come home
I'm so cold

Christmas in Canon in D

Merry Christmas.

Jesus is the Reason for the Season

Canon in D by Trans Siberian Express

Christmas in Sarejevo

Christmas in Sarejevo by the Trans Siberian Express

Pie Jesu

Anyone who knows me well, knows that my newest favorite female vocalist is a young lady from New Zealand by the name of Hayley Westenra. Her first performance that I became acquainted with was of a piece by Andrew Lloyd Webber called Pie Jesu. . .which translated means Jesus, Our Peace. She was 16 years old when she performed this the first time. (by the way, it is pronounced Pee A Hey Su)

I can't watch this video without getting bit teary eyed.

I hope that as you watch and listen to her performance of it, your life will be blessed, you will have a smile on your face, a tear in your eye, and reminder of who is the true and only hope for Peace that mankind has. Both at this Christmas season, and at any other time of the year.

Pie Jesu
performed by Hayley Westenra

Is the world falling apart?

Should we run out and flee to the mountains? Is the whole world crumbling? Are we headed for Chaos and turmoil and political and financial unrest for decades.

There is a time for everything.

And right now is a time to remain calm. Someone Greater than me is in control of it all.

Ecclesiastes 3

Peak Oil. Life after the Crash

This is the most interesting and throughly documented work I've seen on why we need to gain energy independence in the next twenty years. It's also the reason I started investing in oil and gas exploration.

Peak Oil . . . after the Crash.

Caviar

The finest Caviar that money can buy.

These people ship promptly and their Caviar is packed in dry ice. They are excellent vendors of the highest quality reputation.

Somewhere over the Rainbow

I keep looking for a place where "trouble melts like lemon drops".

Somewhere Over the Rainbow

Israel Kamakawiwo from Hawaii is dead now. He weighed in at almost 450 pounds. But he could sing this song like Judy Garland only dreamed of singing it.

OK this one's for Gabby
Ooooo oooooo ohoohohoo
Ooooo ohooohoo oooohoo
Ooooo ohoohooo oohoooo
Oohooo oohoooho ooooho
Ooooo oooooo oooooo
Ooooo oooooo oooooo

Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high
And the dreams that you dreamed of
Once in a lullaby ii ii iii
Somewhere over the rainbow
Blue birds fly
And the dreams that you dreamed of
Dreams really do come true ooh ooooh
Someday I'll wish upon a star
Wake up where the clouds are far behind me ee ee eeh
Where trouble melts like lemon drops
High above the chimney tops thats where you'll find me oh
Somewhere over the rainbow bluebirds fly
And the dream that you dare to,why, oh why can't I? i iiii

Well I see trees of green and
Red roses too,
I'll watch them bloom for me and you
And I think to myself
What a wonderful world

Well I see skies of blue and I see clouds of white
And the brightness of day
I like the dark and I think to myself
What a wonderful world

The colors of the rainbow so pretty in the sky
Are also on the faces of people passing by
I see friends shaking hands
Saying, "How do you do?"
They're really saying, I...I love you
I hear babies cry and I watch them grow,
They'll learn much more
Than we'll know
And I think to myself
What a wonderful world (w)oohoorld

Someday I'll wish upon a star,
Wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where trouble melts like lemon drops
High above the chimney top that's where you'll find me
Oh, Somewhere over the rainbow way up high
And the dream that you dare to, why, oh why can't I? I hiii ?

An Interview with God

there are many gems of Wisdom on this short video.

You can learn more from this video that any man or woman could teach you in a lifetime.

I wish I'd started learning it all sooner.

The Interview with God.

Anyone can become a Millionaire

Anyone can become a millionaire. It just takes discipline and a plan.

I have always told my children . . ."Plan your work, and work your plan. Fail to plan, and plan to fail."

Me and my Annabel Lee

Annabel Lee.
a poem by Edgar Allen Poe

It was many and many a year ago,
In a kingdom by the sea,
That a maiden there lived whom you may know
By the name of Annabel Lee;
And this maiden she lived with no other thought
Than to love and be loved by me.

I was a child and she was a child,
In this kingdom by the sea;
But we loved with a love that was more than love-
I and my Annabel Lee;
With a love that the winged seraphs of heaven
Coveted her and me.

And this was the reason that, long ago,
In this kingdom by the sea,
A wind blew out of a cloud, chilling
My beautiful Annabel Lee;
So that her highborn kinsman came
And bore her away from me,
To shut her up in a sepulchre
In this kingdom by the sea.

The angels, not half so happy in heaven,
Went envying her and me-
Yes!- that was the reason (as all men know,
In this kingdom by the sea)
That the wind came out of the cloud by night,
Chilling and killing my Annabel Lee.

But our love it was stronger by far than the love
Of those who were older than we-
Of many far wiser than we-
And neither the angels in heaven above,
Nor the demons down under the sea,
Can ever dissever my soul from the soul
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee.

For the moon never beams without bringing me dreams
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And the stars never rise but I feel the bright eyes
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And so, all the night-tide, I lie down by the side
Of my darling- my darling- my life and my bride,
In the sepulchre there by the sea,
In her tomb by the sounding sea

Era - Cathar Rhythm and After Time

Waiting . . and waiting.

A young man is inside still

Great Societies are known by how well they treat their elderly and handicapped. How well do people look after those who are most vulnerable is a sign of a nations character. If someday in years to come, you ever look at me as just a crabby old man, then I hope you will remember this poem and know that I'm still a young man in my heart.

A Crabby Old Man

When an old man died in the geriatric ward of a nursing home it was believed that he had nothing left of any value. Later, when the nurses were going through his meager possessions, they found this poem. Its quality and content so impressed the staff that copies were made and distributed to every nurse in the hospital .

One nurse took her copy to Missouri. The old man's sole bequest to
posterity has since appeared in the Christmas edition of the News
Magazine of the St. Louis Association for Mental Health.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~

What do you see nurses? . . . . What do you see?
What are you thinking . . . . .when you're looking at me?
A crabby old man, . . . . . . not very wise, Uncertain of
habit . . . . . with faraway eyes?

Who dribbles his food . . . . and makes no reply
When you say in a loud voice . . . . . "I do wish you'd try!"
Who seems not to notice . . . . .the things that you do.
And forever is losing . . . . . . . A sock or shoe?

Who, resisting or not . . . . . lets you do as you will,
With bathing and feeding . . . . . . . The long day to fill?
Is that what you're thinking? . . . . Is that what you see?
Then open your eyes, nurse . . . . . you're not looking at me.

I'll tell you who I am, . . . . . as I sit here so still,
As I do at your bidding, . . . . . . as I eat at your will
I'm a small child of Ten . . . . . with a father and mother,
Brothers and sisters . . . . . who love one another

A young boy of Sixteen . . . . . . with wings on his feet
Dreaming that soon now . . . . a lover he'll meet.
A groom soon at Twenty. . . . . . My heart gives a leap.
Remembering the vows . . . . . that I promised to keep.

At Twenty-Five, now . . . . . . . I have young of my own.
Who needs me to guide . . . . . And a secure happy home.
A man of Thirty . . . . . . . My young now grown fast,
Bound to teach others . . . . . .With ties that should last.

At Fifty, my young girls . . . . .have grown and are gone,
But my woman's beside me . . . . . to see I don't mourn.
At Fifty, once more, . . . . . . . Babies play 'round my knee,
Again, we know children . . . . . .My loved one and me .

Dark days are upon me . . . . .My wife is now dead.
I look at the future . . . . .. . I shudder with dread.
For my young are all rearing . . . . young of their own.
And I think of the years . . . . . .And the love I've known.

I'm now an old man . . . . . . . . . and nature is cruel.
Tis jest to make old age. . . . . . look like a fool.
The body, it crumbles . . . . . . . . grace and vigor, depart.
There is now a stone . . . . . . . . where I once had a heart.

But inside this old carcass . . . . A young guy still dwells, And
now and again . . . . . . . my battered heart swells
I remember the joys . . . . . I remember the pain.
And I'm loving and living . . . . . life over again.

I think of the years . . all too few . . . . . .gone too fast.
And accept the stark fact . . . . . . .that nothing can last.
So open your eyes, nurse . . . . . . .open and see..
Not a crabby old man . . Look closer . . and see . . .ME ! !

Remember this poem when you next meet an older person who you might
brush aside without looking at the young soul within.

We will all, one day, be there, too!

Ordinary People doing Extraordinary things

I am always inspired by ordinary simple people who demonstrate remarkable or extraordinary skills or talent.

Paul Potts is just such a fellow. And perhaps I have had a chance to see the world's next Pavarotti.

He sings Nessun Dorma.

Can you spot me in the audience?????? Better look quick!

Financial Intelligence

What can you always do with money in times of trouble. One place has always offered unparalled protection of currency assets.

A Man After Midnight

The Broadway show Mama Mia was based on songs from the 70's and 80's pop group Abba.

The theme song was A man after midnight.

me and my grandkids

Ever wonder why perhaps you're not a millionaire?

I'm sure there are exceptions to these ideas. But I think that generally they are true. If you wonder why some one has more financial resources than you, then maybe it's because they were willing to make a sacrifice that you won't make, or they would pay a price that you weren't willing to make.

Here are 10 more possible reasons you aren't rich:
You care what your car looks like: A car is a means of transportation to get from one place to another, but many people don't view it that way. Instead, they consider it a reflection of themselves and spend money every two years or so to impress others instead of driving the car for its entire useful life and investing the money saved.
You feel entitlement: If you believe you deserve to live a certain lifestyle, have certain things and spend a certain amount before you have earned to live that way, you will have to borrow money. That large chunk of debt will keep you from building wealth.
You lack diversification: There is a reason one of the oldest pieces of financial advice is to not keep all your eggs in a single basket. Having a diversified investment portfolio makes it much less likely that wealth will suddenly disappear.
You started too late: The magic of compound interest works best over long periods of time. If you find you're always saying there will be time to save and invest in a couple more years, you'll wake up one day to find retirement is just around the corner and there is still nothing in your retirement account.
You don't do what you enjoy: While your job doesn't necessarily need to be your dream job, you need to enjoy it. If you choose a job you don't like just for the money, you'll likely spend all that extra cash trying to relieve the stress of doing work you hate.
You don't like to learn: You may have assumed that once you graduated from college, there was no need to study or learn. That attitude might be enough to get you your first job or keep you employed, but it will never make you rich. A willingness to learn to improve your career and finances are essential if you want to eventually become wealthy.
You buy things you don't use: Take a look around your house, in the closets, basement, attic and garage and see if there are a lot of things you haven't used in the past year. If there are, chances are that all those things you purchased were wasted money that could have been used to increase your net worth.
You don't understand value: You buy things for any number of reasons besides the value that the purchase brings to you. This is not limited to those who feel the need to buy the most expensive items, but can also apply to those who always purchase the cheapest goods. Rarely are either the best value, and it's only when you learn to purchase good value that you have money left over to invest for your future.
Your house is too big: When you buy a house that is bigger than you can afford or need, you end up spending extra money on longer debt payments, increased taxes, higher upkeep and more things to fill it. Some people will try to argue that the increased value of the house makes it a good investment, but the truth is that unless you are willing to downgrade your living standards, which most people are not, it will never be a liquid asset or money that you can ever use and enjoy.
You fail to take advantage of opportunities: There has probably been more than one occasion where you heard about someone who has made it big and thought to yourself, "I could have thought of that." There are plenty of opportunities if you have the will and determination to keep your eyes open.

Celtic Music

Another style or genre of music that I enjoy. You should widen the horizons of your ear's Pleasure.

Clannad performs Harry's Song from the movie Patriot Games

some more random short story ideas

Still more ideas from the notes yesterday of ideas written down for various short stories and illustrations Things to write about some day from the beach. for the first list of 1 -34 see the entry for yesterday.

35. Usually the difference in winning and losing is a matter of timing. All slot machines eventually have a jackpot. When I was in the Army, my best friend and I would go to the NCO club on Friday and Saturday nights, and sit and have a few martinis and then a great steak dinner and sit and relax and the whole time keep our eyes on the rows of slot machines. We were watching for the guys (no gals then) who would sit at a machine and just keep feeding a steady stream of dimes into the machine until they ran out of money. Their problem was that they weren't losers . . .they just didn't have enough capital to wait for the jackpot. We'd finish out a nice dinner and watch them walk off sad and head hung down, and then we'd get up and go over and put perhaps a roll (or less of dimes) in the same machine and collect the first jackpot that came up. And then we'd leave the machine rather than let it take back from us our winnings. It was always enough to cover the cost of the roll we put in, plus our dinner and drinks and we'd usually leave with enough to get a ride to the movie and then lunch the next day. We weren't any luckier than the losers. Just smarter. We were rewarded for our patience and observation and intelligence. It was all a matter of timing.
36. Using your competition to your advantage. I heard a great story one time from the Real Estate vice president of Wendy's. He talked about what a huge real estate department McDonalds had and how many millions and millions of dollars they poured into salaries and research to find exactly the right . . .and best . . .locations to place a new McDonalds. Wendy's on the other hand had a very small real estate department and very low overhead. But they still cared about good location. So they used McDonalds real estate department for their locations. Quite simply . . . they just waited for McDonalds to select a site and then they tried to get a location as close to them as possible.
37. Just because an idea failed the first time you tried it, doesn't mean it was a bad idea. Sometimes the firecracker just needs a longer fuse to keep it from blowing up in your hand. Sometimes the oil was in the right spot, but you just didn't drill deep enough? Or maybe you drilled too deep?
38. Hotels are a great place to sell roses. And a lot of other things too. If you have a shoe store and someone buys a pair of shoes, why not also carry a line of belts and sell them a belt at the same time?
39. If you want a bigger piece of the pie, it's easier to make a bigger pie and get the same % of it, than it is to fight off others for part of their piece. What do you care if everyone else gets more too. If your goal was just to have more for yourself and your goal was met, then be happy if you gave everyone else a blessing too.
40. Do you have a rate for library card holders? I never liked the idea of discounting my hotels rooms just because a guest wanted to stand at the front desk and try to negotiate the room charge lower. I felt like it cheapened my product. On the other hand, I didn't want them walking off without getting them to stay with me. I figured it was better to get something for a vacant room than nothing if it was 11 at night and we were not sold out. So as a last resort, we'd ask them if they had a Sear's card or an Exxon card and offer them the discount. We were both happy. I got something from them and sold an empty room. But I left them with the impression that our rates were not negotiable. They got a place to sleep and felt like they'd gotten a surprise benefit and discount. We both won. That's the best business transaction you can have.
41. Circles of Influence. Years ago, the small town I had a hotel in built a by-pass around town and my sales dropped 20% in one day. I had to do something. One idea was that I went to see every funeral director in town, and made them a reservation agent for my hotel. When they would go to see the family the first time after a death, they would make a simple reminder to the family and ask if there would be members coming in from out of town so they (the funeral director) could call my hotel and reserve a small block or rooms at "his/her" special bereavement rate. It made the funeral director look like a hero because they provided a good service to the family, and it got the family directed toward my hotel for placing their family members during the funeral, rather than just leaving it up to them to decide for themselves. The added benefit to the family was that it got all of their out of town family members staying at one place . . . my hotel. It was a Win/Win/Win situation. But the super-duper benefit to me was that when they came we always tried to be friendly and accommodating and . . . as is often the case . . .the funeral gathering would turn into a small family reunion. And we'd give them coffee at night and allow them to all meet in our lobby and gathering room and spend time with each other. The first winter we did this, we ended up booking about 10 family reunions for the following summer. Circles of influence. Find a way to make everyone your personal sales representative.
42. Measurable advertising. Unless you have a swollen ego and just want to see your name in lights, don't spend money on advertising that you can't measure the results of.
43. Reciprocating Business. Pressure your suppliers to use your product. Or stay in your hotel. You give them business, and tell them you expect them to give you business. If they give you the line, that they need to pass their business around, just tell them that you probably need to do the same. It's amazing how many will forgo their other clients who don't put it so "forcefully" and give you all their business.
44. Unintended results can sometimes be a wonderful benefit. I used to stop at a gas station to get gas and a canned Diet Coke. One day I stopped and Coca Cola had put in a new "talking vending machine". This was a few years ago when their theme song was the melody from "I'd like to teach the world to sing, in perfect harmony". Anyway, when you walked up and put your money in, it would play that little melody and then a digital voice would come out and say "please make your selection Now". One day as I was walking up to the machine a lady was in front of me. She . . .quite obviously . . .had never seen (or heard) a talking vending machine. (Note: for those of you under the age of 30, digital stuff like that has only been around since about 1985 very much). When she put her money in, it played the melody and the lady sort of stepped back in amazement. But then when the voice came on and said "please make your selection Now", she about leaped off the ground. If you can imagine the look on her face when she jumped back from the machine and looked at me and then back at the machine . . . it was as though there was a man in the machine. She very slowed stepped up toward the machine . . .and looked back at me . . .and leaned way over and said "I'd like a Coca Cola please!". Of course . . nothing happened. (and I had to restrain myself a tiny bit in amusement). She then leaned back over and more forcefully and much louder (as though it didn't hear her the first time) said "I SAID . . I'D LIKE A COCA COLA PLEASE!!!!!" Again . . . . (obviously) . . .nothing happened. She looked back at me with a very very puzzled look on her face. I guess she assumed I could help her. So I just said, "I think you have to press the button for your selection". She smiled BIG . . .as though a light had just come on in her head . . . and she leaned back over and pressed the Coke button and . . . .at the same time YELLED . . . "I'D LIKE A COCA COLA PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!". Of course, then the drink fell out, and she picked it up and opened it and was so happy with herself because she (with my help) had mastered this marvelous new piece of technology. But then . . . she just stood there. She had mastered it, and now she was going to watch . . . in amazement . . .as I mastered it too. Soooooooooooo. . . me being the kind and gentle person I am, who could not hurt her feelings . . . .I leaned over and pressed the Diet Coke button and YELLED "I'D LIKE A DIET COKE PLEASE". Then we both stood there and enjoyed our drinks together and discussed how very rapidly the world was progressing. She was very happy with herself. So why should I have taken that away from her? After all, we'd both gotten our drinks. I do wonder though if she ever wondered when a new person came and got inside the machine to dispense the drinks?????
45. Bait and Switch is not necessarily bad. Sometimes I don't mind be allured into something with one price only to then discover that something bigger or better is also available at a good price too. (Story of the Lemonade sales boy and girl to come later)
46. Give people choices. We have three kinds of rooms in my hotel. Standard, Deluxe and Executive. As I said before, if someone only has half the money you want for your product, then try to sell them half a product. If they don't have the money for an Executive Room, then have a Standard room that is half that price. If they came in the first place to try and give you some of their money, well . . .then . . .don't let them leave without taking it.
47. Never make someone stand in line when they are trying to give you their money.
48. Give back. Give more of yourself to others than you think others give to you. The Law of Returns, says that it will come back to you.
49. Native Wisdom. There are two bears living inside of you.
An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life."A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy. "It is a terrible fight and it is between two bears.
One is evil - he is anger, envy,sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.
The other is good - he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.
This same fight is going on inside you - and inside every other person, too."
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which bear will win?"
The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."
50. Something is not deception if it is the truth. There is no harm in framing the truth in a manner that will be most appealing to your customers. If your business is built on top of a former landfill, then just promote your site as being located in one of the most notable ecological collections in the world. And then spread some wildflowers around. People will draw their own conclusions and if they assume the wildflowers are the "eco beauty" then sobeit.
51. Bribery is not necessarily a bad thing. What is the harm in introducing your product to a new prospect by giving them a sample to try it out. That is bribery in it's purest form. If you make a repeat customer out of them and they come back 100 times, your advertising budget was only 1% per customer. That is a good return!
52. Don't let someone else gamble with your Ranch. I was in a partnership one time and we were operating on my capital. I came into the office one Monday morning and my partner had taken a very, very, very large risk over the weekend . . on a hunch!. He told me that he "felt" sure it was a good risk and that we needed to "bet the ranch" on the deal. I told him that I hoped he was right (and fortunately he was) but that it was easy to bet the ranch . . .if it wasn't your ranch. The opposite of this rule is also true. It's always best to gamble with someone elses money "if" they let you. You have a much greater moral responsibility but you have nothing to lose. Tread with caution when doing so.
52. Be forward thinking. Think outside the box. To see how your baby sees things, spend a few hours a week crawling around the house on your knees to get things from the baby's perspective. If you have a hotel, stay in one of your own rooms once in a while to see what your guests think. Ask your customers lots of questions. Get the point of view of your customers rather than trying to give them your point of view. Also, this is really number 53. Just checking
54. People will pay you to make them look like a hero. (story of my Florist idea for men)
55. The best investment you can make is to invest in yourself to make more money.
(Joe Girard and his birthday cards)
56. You can in fact . . if you are pursuasive enough . . sell Ice Cream to an Eskimo. But do you really want to go to the north pole? Is the result worth the effort? Or are you just trying to puff yourself up and inflate your own ego. Is the world really going to be any better off if Eskimos are eating Ice Cream?
57. Dress the part. Wear a suite to buy. And jeans to sell. When I was in the real estate development business years ago, and wanting to buy something, I wore a suit. I wanted the seller to feel like I was succesful and prosperous and he/she was getting the absolute highest dollar for their property. 

 When I was going to try and sell something, I wore jeans and wanted the buyer to feel like I needed money more than anyone in the world. I also wanted to appear the least intellectual between the two of us.
58. Adopt your product to a niche. Make the same product "specifically" for many different niches and make each niche feel like it was made just for them. For instance, if I were selling insurance I'd have a policy that I said was good for "over 40 auto assembly line workers with high school aged children". I think I'd get em all. And the policy would in fact be good for them. And then I'd take the same policy and sell it to "under 50 clerical workers with no children at home".
59. You can't catch any fish if you don't first get the hook in their mouth. Related to this one is: You can't possibly win if you don't enter.
60. Sometimes if you don't have anything to feel good about just have someone hit you on the head with a hard book and then you can at least feel good about how good it feels to not be hit anymore.
61. Keep pads handy and write things down. (Just like I did with all these things years ago)
62. Sometimes others "don't" want to do something more than you "don't" want to do it. You can make a lot money from this. (IBM training manual story)
63. Related to the funeral director story above, give others an incentive to sell for you. Duplicate and clone yourself. Have an unpaid sales force of hundreds or thousands.
64. Your customers will have a hard time getting in to buy something from you if your door is locked. (consider this) What are the obstacles you have placed in front of your own customers. Do you make it easy for them to give you your money or difficult?
65. Find your best points and make sure they are magnified to your customers. If your ice cream bar doesn't have chocolate coating then advertise how pure your vanilla is.
66. Just because you don't like what you see in the mirror, doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. Maybe the mirror needs to be replaced? Or maybe you just need to look at yourself from a more attractive angle?
67. Feelings are not right or wrong. They are just feelings. And you are entitled to them.
68. Objectives and Goals. You have to have objective to reach your goal. I can make a goal on January 1 to spend more time with my kids. But if I don't have objectives to reach that will determine the goal was met, then I have no idea at the end of the year whether I did it or didn't.
69. If you can't stand the heat, then get out of the kitchen . . . or get an air conditioner brought in and get rid of the heat?
70. Don't offer to put out my fire if you don't have any water. And if I have a fire going on, all I want at the moment is for you to help me put it out. I will not be in the mood for hearing from you about all the other fires you have witnessed in your life, or heard about.
71. Jesus just managed 12. Amazon.com does not have any meeting that can't be fed by two large pizzas. Who do you think you are if you're trying to directly supervise more than 12 folks. I've found that about 6 is my limit. That's half of what God was able to do after all.
72. Begin each task with the idea that ALL things are possible. Then work backwards to eliminate the things that keep it from becoming reality. Sometimes it takes team work and the only thing holding you back is a partner to balance you out.

some short story ideas

I came across some scribbled legal pad pages today while cleaning out some files. I remember making the notes one sleepless night just as random thoughts of things I've learned over the years. Each is an idea that I could write many pages about. I'll put them here as a reminder to finish the thoughts out someday when I'm laying on the beach in Belize one week a month.

1. You can win by losing most of the time. If you lose $1.00 on 9 out of 10 decisions, but make 20.00 one the decision you got right, you come out ahead. Keep your losses small, and let your profits run and grow!
2. You will usually get the better end of any deal by letting the other person believe they are smarter than you. I always want to appear at a disadvantage in any business deal . . .at least intellectually . . . with the other side, and by so doing, they will usually make some serious blunder in the transaction because they have been deceived by their own vanity. Stroke peoples ego and vanity if they are puffed up, and both will grow to a point of handicapping them and blinding them to wise judgement.
3. Push, pull, ride, or get out of my way. Life is made up of those who make things happen, those who watch things happen, and those who end up just saying "what happened?". I want to be in the first group. As the saying goes "unless you are the lead dog in the pack, the scenery never changes."
4. One of the easiest things to make money at, is to find some task to do that no one else wants to do. People will pay you a fortune to do their unpleasant needs.
5. When you're selling something and someone only has half as much money as you want, then try to sell them half of what you've got.
6. Don't force your employees to be thieves. Pay people the absolute maximum you can pay them, and make sure you pay them enough to meet their needs. If you don't they will be forced to steal from you. They will either steal money, or they will get a second job to make ends meet, and then they will be robbing you of their best effort.
7. I will always get out of life the most that can be had, if I first make it my mission to help others get out of life what they want most. It is the law of returns.
8. I also get the most profit by duplicating myself. I need to clone myself over and over and over. As one man I am limited to what I can make in 20 hours a day. If I duplicate myself a dozen times and make only 10% of the profit from each of their labor, I will make more from their collective efforts than I could have made by myself.
9. Related to number 2, is to always regard others more highly than myself. For those who have inflated egos it will lead to your success and their disadvantage. For those who themselves, have controlled egos, it will honor them and be respectful and they will return the honor to you and respect you. Either way, you will come out ahead. Call everyone sir or maam or madam until they tell you to call them by their first names. Even if they are younger than you. Give respect, and you will earn respect.
10. People's needs are not determined by your store hours but your store hours should be determined by their needs. Keep your priorities in order.
11. All I need to beat my competition is a slight competitive edge.
12. It's not a beautiful or useful product if no one else thinks so besides you.
13. You don't have a line of elephants if you have two aadvarks in the middle.
14. You can't line people up in a circle.
15. Pardon me. Is my underwear showing? Encourage others to show you your blind side.
16. Don't let someone try to rescue you from drowning if they can't swim.
17. Likewise, you can't rescue someone from drowning if YOU can't swim.
18. Make friends with your enemies is the best way to not have enemies. Otherwise, slay them.
19. One way to lose weight if you eat too many donuts is to go by one night and just blow up the donut shop. (when no one is there of course). Tongue in cheek. But the point is, to solve a problem . . .think outside the box and identify EVERY possible solution.
20. You can make a better slide rule, but no one will want to buy it. You can build a better mousetrap, but no one's going to want it if they don't have mice. Create or see a need. Then make a product or service to meet the need. Don't make something that no one needs.
21. I have found in my life that round wheels work best. So there you go. Now you know that too. Don't waste any of your time trying to wonder about that anymore. Go do something useful. How can you make a better, smoother, faster, "round" wheel. That's how to be successful. If you try to find a way to make square wheels work, you will waste your life.
22. Yes. With faith you can move a mountain. But what are you going to do with the dirt? Use your faith for things that you need it for. Probably you'll be happier just moving the molehills out of the way.
23. "Gosh, I don't want to do THAT. So let's hurry up and get started and get it done. Get the annoyances out of your life and stop stressing over the unfinished, unpleasant tasks.
24. You don't need more than 1 friend out of 10 to kick you in the rear. Surround yourself mostly with friends that will encourage you on to greatness.
25. Profit is good. And it's ok to get rewarded in a business enterprise and even to make skillions of dollars doing something for being smarter, faster, or more efficient than anyone else. If they don't like you having so much more money than them, they need to go invent something wonderful.
26. Sell people more than they expect to get for less than they expect to pay. You'll make a fortune. Regardless of how much profit you make.
27. Curtis Mathis and Hobbs Bonded fibers. Make something or offer something that is so far superior to your competition that you have no competition. Stand so far above the crowd that people cannot comparison shop your prices. Be in a league of your own and then you can set your own price.
28. You can't sell something for a price that is greater than someones desire or need. Regardless of what you have to pay to make it.
29. If people's desire isn't high enough to pay your price, then increase their desire. Unload a truckload of mice in their yard and they will flock to you to buy mousetraps.
30. You can't sell a lady a pair of shoes that fit you. They need to fit her.
31. People will always be envious or resentful of your success. Because if they can't understand my success, then they have no understanding of their own failure.
32. New clean oats cost about 4.00 a bushel. If you can be satisfied with oats that have already been through the horse one time, those are considerably cheaper. I sell new clean oats.
33. Father Tyl and the back up plan for the racehorse lottery.
34. Give people raises in money first and then if you've done that as much as you can, give them titles to raise their esteem. Have a supreme housekeeper. And a Superior Maintenance Superintendent.

That's only half my list. More coming later.

ERA and Ameno and my fantasy

My fantasy . .to be a knight on a big horse!

CLICK HERE

I do know that you can't own a falcon. The falcon is yours because it chooses to be yours. You let it go and it chooses to fly back to you.

The Joy of a child

I just look at pictures of my grandchildren sometimes, and want to break out in a grin. I love them so much.

ROFWDL . . Rolling on the floor with dog laughing.

THE WORK OF STEVEN WRIGHT
If you're not familiar with the work of Steven Wright, he's the guy who
once said: "I woke up one morning and all of my stuff had been stolen...and replaced by exact duplicates." Iread these to a friend's dog and we both thought they were funny.

Here are some more of his gems:

I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
Borrow money from pessimists - they don't expect it back.
Half the people you know are below average.
99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
42.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.
All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand.
The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
OK, so what's the speed of dark?
How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
I intend to live forever - so far, so good.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.
Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

Stress Relief Technique

Just in case you're having a rough day, here's a stress management technique recommended in all the latest psychological texts. The funny
thing is that it really works...

1. Picture yourself near a stream.

2. Birds are softly chirping in the cool mountain air.

3. No one but you knows your secret place.

4. You are in total seclusion from the hectic place called "the world."

5. The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of serenity.

6. The water is crystal clear.

7. You can easily make out the face of the person you're holding underwater.

My newest friends from Hungary

A few months ago I received a link to a short video of two men who were obviously very skilled and trained gymnists. CLICK HERE. This is the greatest demonstration of human strength and physical discipline I have ever witnessed in my life. I have been so in awe of their accomplishment that I have probably watched the video a hundred times, and each time I'm as impressed as I was the very first time.

Finally after many viewings I decided that I wanted see them in person and one night while up in the middle of the night working, I decided to begin a search to find them. It took many, many googles searches and looking at many links to finally find a contact email address that I "thought" might get me their location and touring schedule. And soooooooooooooo, I just wrote them a letter and told them of my admiration and desire to meet them.

I was so startled a few days ago to get a very personal letter back from them. They are two brothers from CLICK HERE Hungary and actually performed in the Hungarian Circus.

They told me they are now CLICK HERE performing in France at the Lido de Paris for one year. And they invited me to come and see them and said that we could all three go out and they would show me around and we could have "good festival".

I'm not sure when, but I will see them perform. And they would like to return to America and perform here again. I have new far-away friends now.

The Earth Calendar

The Earth Calendar

Father's Day June 15, 2008

Our annual Father's day get together to discuss life, the economy, the future and hear my ideas about the financial status of the world economy to preserve capital and increase our family wealth.

teddy roosevelt on achievement

"It is not the critic who counts,
nor the man who points out
where the strong man stumbled,
or where a doer of deeds
could have done them better.
The credit belongs to the man in the arena
whose face is marred by dust
and sweat and blood,
who strives valiantly, who errs,
and who comes up short again and again,
who knows the great enthusiasms,
the great devotions,
and spends himself in a worthy cause.
The man who at best knows the triumph
of high achievement and who at worst,
if he fails, fails while daring greatly,
so that his place will never be
with those cold timid souls
who never knew victory or defeat."

Teddy Roosevelt

Arlene

Some people can't be bullied

I love this kid. He stood up to the bullies and kept on going on toward his dream.

Pie Jesu

by Andrew Johnston

Calming myself

. It's been a stressful day. CLICK HERE. And on days like this I will listen to this beautiful music from Dante's love story of Beatrice as performed in La Vita Nuova

I hope that you enjoy this condensation of it.

In Dante's first sonnet:
Dante's Vita Nuova and the Vision of the Eaten Heart

In chapter III of Dante's Vita Nuova the poet returns to his home "overcome with ecstasy" at having been greeted, for the first time as an adult, by his beloved Beatrice. His joy is short-lived, however, since he is soon upset by a "marvelous vision" that appears to him in his sleep. A figure who identifies himself as Dante's "master" holds a woman, naked except for a crimson cloth, in his arms. The figure holds a "fiery object" in his hands, telling Dante, "Behold your heart." The figure then holds Dante's heart up to the woman, who proves to be Beatrice, and makes
her eat it from his hands. After a short while the figure begins weeping bitterly,
and weeping, he folds his arms over the woman and together they ascend towards the heavens. At this point Dante awakes, and is inspired to write a sonnet addressed to "all Love's faithful subjects" in which he requests help in interpreting his vision. In Dante’s “Inferno”, his character Pierre de la Vingna was imprisoned in hell for his betrayal of the Kings trust. His punishment there was to be able to continually behold the woman (a picture of Beatrice) that he loved, and yet never be able to possess her.

The Pathway to Great Riches

To my Friends and Others,
Years ago I was asked to deliver the graduation message at a small private school. I pondered for weeks what words I could say to the graduates that would offer them a brighter hope for their future. I wanted words that might be life changing for them. And I remembered a story that I had heard from a friend about a man and I remembered the secret that had been unlocked for me in my own heart when I heard the story. I took that story of a man who lived many years before me, and embellished it somewhat to fit the culture of today. Today, I found this story saved on my computer and was rereading it. It still inspires me today, the same way it did the first time I heard of this man called Rowan. I have spent many years and much effort in trying to him. There are few priceless things that any person can pass on to another. But this is one. Perhaps you’ll read the story and it will unlock for you, or your children, or someone you know, the secret to a great buried treasure. Perhaps you’ve already discovered in your life the secret in the story. And if so, then feel free to pass the story on to others you know, who might need a road map to a brighter future. If on the other hand you read it and disagree with its philosophy, then feel free also, to send it to the recycle bin. If this attachment happens someday to fall into the hands of a man named Rowan, then I’d love to hear back from him that this message reached him.


Your friend,
Bud


For graduation this year I wanted to come and give each of you a gift of fabulous riches. A long time ago, a friend told me how to obtain more riches than most people have ever imagined. Within the words I am about to tell you is a hidden map. You must listen very carefully to the story I am about to tell you to discover the instructions to find where this treasure is. However, you do not need to take any special care with safeguarding these instructions because most people will not be able to understand how to find the treasure. If after hearing my words, you still have to ask me what the secret is, then you .
have failed to read the map.


I have a question for each of you today? It’s a question being asked over and over every day in every part of the world by hundreds, perhaps thousands of people. Who can find a faithful man or woman? In all of United States history, one person stands out on in my mind as much as any other. I have heard of a faithful man.


Many decades ago, when war broke out between Spain and the United States, it was necessary to communicate quickly with the leader of the Insurgents in a small island country south of the United States. A man named Garcia was somewhere in the mountain vastnesses of Cuba - no one knew where. No mail or telegraph message could reach him. The President of the United States needed to secure his cooperation, and quickly. What could he do? Someone said to the President, “There is a fellow by the name of Rowan who will find Garcia for you, if anybody can.”

Rowan was sent for and given a letter to be delivered to Garcia. How the “fellow by the name of Rowan” took the letter, sealed it up in an oilskin pouch, strapped it over his heart, in four days landed by night off the coast of Cuba from an open boat, disappeared into the jungle, and in three weeks came out on the other side of the Island, having traversed a hostile country on foot, and delivered his letter to Garcia - these are things I have no time now to tell in detail. The point that I wish to make is this: The President gave Rowan a letter to be delivered to Garcia; Rowan took the letter and did not ask, “How can I find him?” This was a man whose form should be cast in deathless bronze and the statue placed in every school in this country. It is not book-learning young people need most, nor instruction about this and that, but a stiffening of the backbone which will cause them to be loyal, to be trustworthy, to act promptly, concentrate their energies, and in short - to be faithful - to be able to “Carry a message to Garcia.” With these qualities, any person will obtain all the wisdom and knowledge to be found in every book.


General Garcia is dead now, and so is Rowan. But there are other Garcias to be reached. But the world is still searching for Rowan every day to reward him for his faithfulness. Personally, every day I strive to be a Rowan, and every day I look to find another person like him. Every man or woman who has endeavored to carry out an enterprise where many hands were needed, has been appalled, at times, by the stupidity of the mediocre woman or man - the inability or unwillingness of most people to concentrate on a thing and to do it. Slipshod assistance, foolish inattention, dowdy indifference, and half-hearted work seem the rule: and no man seems to succeed unless by hook or crook or threat or bribes. Perhaps they expect God in His great goodness will perform a miracle, and send them an Angel of Light for an assistant. Perhaps if they wait long enough, someone else will take up the task. You, my friend, put this matter to a test: You are sitting someday in an office and six assistants are within your call. Summon one of them and make a request: “please look in the encyclopedia and make a brief memorandum for me concerning the life of Corregio.” Will the assistant quietly say, “Yes sir,” or “Yes Ma’am” and go do the task ? Probably they will not. More than likely, they will look at you out of a fishy eye and ask one or more of the following questions: Who was he? Which encyclopedia? Where is the encyclopedia? Was I hired for that? Don’t you mean Bismarck? What’s the matter with Charlie doing it? I didn’t see that this was part of my job description! Is he dead? Is there any hurry? Shall I bring you the book and let you look it up yourself? Why do you want to know? And I will lay you ten to one that after you have answered the questions, and explained how to find the information, and why you want it, the assistant will go off and get one of the other clerks to help them try to find the answer - and then come back and tell you there is no such man as Corregio.


Of course I may lose my bet, but according to the Law of Averages I will not. Now if you are wise, you will not bother to explain to your “assistant” that Corregio is indexed under the C’s, not in the K’s, but you will still smile very sweetly and say, “Never Mind,” and go look it up yourself. And this incapacity for independent action, this moral stupidity, this infirmity of the will, this unwillingness to cheerfully catch hold and lift - these are the things that assure me that pure Socialism will never come to pass. If men will not act for themselves, what will they do when the benefit of their effort is for all? The dread of getting “the pink slip” on Friday afternoon keeps too many a worker in their place. Advertise for a typist, and five out of ten who apply can neither spell nor punctuate - and do not think it is necessary to. In my own business enterprise, I have an employment application which about two thirds of the way down the page clearly and emphatically says, UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES WRITE BELOW THIS SENTENCE. And yet, 50% of the applicants who apply to work for me, continue on writing and answering the questions below that line. Can such a person be counted on to take a letter to Garcia?

“You see that bookkeeper,” said the supervisor in a large factory to me. “Yes; what about him?” Well, he’s a fine accountant, but if I’d send him to town on an errand, he might accomplish the errand all right, and on the other hand, he might stop at four shops on the way, and when he got to where he was going, he probably would have forgotten what he had been sent for.” Can such a person be entrusted to carry a message to Garcia?

We have recently been hearing much sad sympathy expressed for the “downtrodden workers of the sweatshop” and the “homeless wanderer who will work for food,” and with it all, often go many hard words for the people in power. Nothing is said about the employer who grows old before his time in a vain attempt to get an employee to do intelligent work, and his long, patient striving after “help” that often does nothing but take a break when his back is turned. In every store and factory there is a constant weeding-out process going on. The employer is constantly sending away “help” that have shown their incapacity to further the interests of the business, and others are being hired. No matter how good times are, this sorting continues. If times are hard and work is scarce, the sorting is done finer - but out, and forever out, the unneeded and mediocre will go. It is the survival of the not fittest, but the most hardworking and FAITHFUL. Self-interest prompts every employer to keep the best - those who can carry a message to Garcia. Now this is not to say that the most faithful themselves might not be dismissed on occasion by an employer who would fail to see their earnestness. But if this happens to you, rest assured. There are 1000 other employers out there that will rehire you and who are waiting and hoping for you to show up at their door. A faithful person may get cast out sometime, but they will not be cast down.


I know one man of really brilliant mentality, who has not the ability to manage a business of his own, and yet who is absolutely worthless to any one else, because he carries with him constantly the insane suspicion that any employer is oppressing, or intending to oppress him. He can not give orders, and he will not receive them. Should a message be given him to take to Garcia, his answer would probably be, “Take it yourself!” Today this man walks the streets looking for work, the wind whistling through his threadbare coat. No one who knows him would dare employ him, because he is a regular firebrand of discontent. He is impervious to reason, and the only thing that can impress him is the toe of a thick-soled Number Twelve boot.


Of course I know that one so morally deformed is to be pitied; but in our pitying let us drop a tear, too, for the men and women who are striving to carry on a great enterprise, whose working hours are not limited by the whistle, and whose hair is fast turning white through the struggle to hold the line, in spite of indifference, slipshod stupidity, and the heartless ingratitude of many of their employees which, but for their enterprise, would be both hungry and homeless.


Have I put the matter too strongly? Possibly I have. But when all the world has gone a-slumming I wish to speak a word of sympathy for the person who succeeds - the person who, against great odds, has directed the efforts of others, and having succeeded, finds there’s nothing in it: nothing but bare board and clothes. I myself, have fried hamburgers at Dairy Queen, emptied a grease trap, mopped a floor, repaired a roof, and worked for day’s wages. I have also been an employer of labor, and I know there is something to be said on both sides. There is no excellence, per se, in poverty; rags are no recommendation; and all employers are not MEAN and high-handed, any more than all poor men are virtuous. My heart goes out to the employee who does their work when the “boss” is away, as well as when they are in the office or on the factory floor. And the man who, when he is given a letter for Garcia, quietly takes the note, without asking any idiotic questions, and with no lurking intention of chucking it into the nearest trash can, or of doing anything else but delivering it. Civilization is one long, anxious search for just such individuals. ANYTHING such as a man or woman, like Rowan asks, shall be granted. They are wanted in every city, town, and village - in every office, hotel, shop, store, and factory. I myself would hire as many as I could find. I would help them to become rich. In time, I would pay them a fortune. And in the meantime, I would make a fortune myself by profiting from their faithfulness. I would teach them any skills they might be lacking in exchange for their possession of dedication to a task and their faithfulness to serving me. The world cries out for such; they are needed and needed badly - the man, or woman, who can “Carry a Message to Garcia.” If you ever meet a Rowan, who is looking for a job. Send him, or her to me. I look for her every day. Good luck to each of you. May God give you a speedy, safe and prosperous journey if you, yourself, decide to carry a message to Garcia. Godspeed.

Some random thoughts

some thoughts in general. much thanks to Andy Rooney too, for helping me to sometimes bring precision to my own thinking.

I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some governmental stooge with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to crack addicts for squirting out babies. If I make 10,000.00 and pay 20% taxes, then if I make 100,000.00 I think I should still pay 20% taxes. The government is run by politicians who want to take from me all they can and give to those who don't have anything to their name but a vote. I'm willing to pay taxes for highways, and national defense, and maybe some nice libraries and national parks. But I'm not willing to pay to send money to some foreign country that hates us anyway, or pay for health care for people who refuse to work, or for teaching immigrant children how to speak in their native tongue instead of English.

The war in Iraq is not about freedom or democracy or liberation. It is about oil and keeping it available and first, and foremost, keeping it available to the United States.

Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.

I don't think being a minority makes you a victim of anything except numbers.

I think women are generally smarter than men. Also more dramatic.

I voted five times for Ronald Reagan for President. He was not the sharpest crayon in the box, but he sure made me feel good about being an American. 

I think the police should have every right to shoot your sorry self if you threaten them after they tell you to stop. If you live in this country you should understand the words "freeze"or "stop" in English. I don't think I hate a single soul today, and I have forgiven those who have sinned against me. But I still would shoot someone right on the spot if they hurt my family or came in my house in the middle of the night without my permission.

We did not go to the aid of certain foreign countries and risk our lives in wars to defend their freedoms, so that decades later they could come over here and tell us our constitution is a living document: and open to their interpretations.

I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor. I believe a self-righteous liberal or conservative with a cause is more dangerous than a Hell's Angel with an attitude.

I think that having a twinkie and glass of milk every afternoon should be mandatory for every person over the age of 5. (Oreos can be substituted) An afternoon nap should be required for every adult over the age of 30.

I can put my finger in a glass of water and when I take it out, it doesn't leave a hole. There's a lesson there that will keep a person's ego in line.

I think Bill Gates has every right to keep every penny he made and continue to make more. If it ticks you off, go and invent the next operating system that's better, and put your name on the building.

It doesn't take a whole village to raise a child right, but it does take a parent to stand up to the kid: and smack their little behinds when necessary, and say "NO!" If people are going to take children on airplanes they should keep them from kicking the back of my seat. I can put in earplugs to drown out their uncontrolled squealling but for gosh sakes at least exercise enough control to keep their feet still.

I think the TSA are doing a wonderful job at our airports. I don't mind the delay at all. I feel safer today because of them and always take the time to tell them thank you. I try to take them a Hallmark Card at least once a month and give to them as I'm passing through security. They always get the biggest smile on their face when you tell them thank you. The people that complain and bitch the loudest about the delays are the morons who got to the airport 30 minutes prior to departure and they shouldn't be allowed to fly anyway. In fact, I think airlines and flight attendents should be able to refuse a seat to any traveler who does not smile.

The words "i am sorry" do more to make world peace than any other words in a language.

I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please stay home until that new lip ring heals. I don't want to look at your ugly infected mouth as you serve me french fries!

There are two kinds of stupid in the world. The first is the guy who gets naked and drunk and runs around in the woods, and howls at the moon, and barks like a dog and pee's on a tree. And the second, is the same guy who does it in my front yard. The first I can ignore. The second I have to deal with.

There are a lot of people in this world that were born on third base and are so stupid they act like they hit a triple.

Telemarketers and bad lawyers

I own a hotel and I get about 100 phone calls a day. 98% of them are from people I have no desire to speak with. My employees usually shield me very well, but once in a while a telephone sales person slips through and I pick up the phone and they start their sales pitch. Now they're not all bad. Out of say . . . . 500 . . . that I've talked to . . . at least 2 were nice and worth chatting with. And me, being the nice guy that I am, cannot just be rude and slam the phone down. So I've some ways that at least allow me to use the time to amuse myself at their expense., so the phone call was not a total waste of my time. Friends who have been in my office when I take a call from a telephone sales person have told me they would like to try some of my lines. Perhaps you will too. And if you have any Lawyers that you'd like to get even with, feel free to pass this on. Enjoy. Bud McElhaney

My way of dealing with Telemarketers:


My All time personal best #1 response: If they are a supplier that has many products, such as supplies or equipment, after they start to give me their pitch, I ask how many products they sell. I tell them I would like to be seriously interested in everything they have. Could they fax me the paperwork? Every single page. And then I give them my competitor/s fax number. I insist on it being faxed not mailed escpecially if it's a fifty pages or more. And then I tell them to call me back in a day or two. And then I tell them (truthfully) that I never got the fax and would they resend it again. This ties my competitor's fax machine up for hours. I have never gotten anyone to fax it more than twice.

On some days I ask them to fax it to the fax number of a law firm that sued me. I have three different firms that I don't like, and I really only try to have them faxed the 50+ page faxes. I am always careful on this one and do not say "my fax". I just say "fax it to" and then give the law firm's fax number. This by the way is not difficult to get. Just call the firm and ask the receptionist for the fax number for the particular attorney. The really big shots have their own direct fax lines. (PS. Unrelated to telemarketers, but a great way to take out a little anger a hostile lawyers - I like to tear out the "request for information " cards at the backs of magazines and give the lawyer's name and and address. Always request a personal contact if it has that option. Some cards have a hundred things your can get info on). (PPS. This is also something good to do with the little boxes you sometimes see for a free facial sign-up. I always write down the name of lawyers I don't like and ask for the consultant to contact them urgently for a free facial) At state fairs and county fairs, always sign up lawyers that you hate for home improvement estimates and siding and insurance. Those sales people are so persistent they will hazzle the lawyer and his family to pieces for months. If possible request the salesperson come by the house.

If they want to loan me money, I tell them I just filed for bankruptcy and I could sure use some money. I ask them is there anyway possible I could get it today. Then I plead with them to PLEASE get it to me today. PLEASE. PLEASE. PRETTY PLEASE. Finally they will just hang up on me.


If they start out with, "How are you today?" I say, "I'm so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems. My arthritis is acting up, my eyes are sore, my dog just died, I have diarreaha, I am vomiting (then I describe the vomit), my feet hurt, my feet smell (then I try to describe the smell -this is usually "their" hang up point, etc. "

If they say they're John Doe from XYZ Company, I ask them to spell their name. Then I ask them to spell the company name. Then I ask them where it is located, how long it has been in business, how many people work there, how they got into this line of work ,if they are married, how many kids they have, etc. I continue asking them personal questions or questions about their company for as long as necessary. Usually they hang up by now, but if they don't I start asking personal questions about their marriage. This will get the hang up.

This works great if you are male. Telemarketer: "Hi, my name is Judy and I'm with XYZ Company. " Me: Wait for a second and with a real husky voice I ask, "What are you wearing Judy?"

or depending on my mood,

I cry out in surprise, "Judy? Is that you? Oh my Gosh! Judy, how have you been?" This will give Judy a few brief moments of terror as she tries to figure out where she could know you from. No matter what she says I keep saying I know her. And insist that we see each other again. I have tried doing this with guys, but just can't seem to keep my voice straight. It works better with the opposite sex.

I tell them that I am not legally responsible for my actions and that I am under the guardianship of an adult supervisor. And I can't stay on the phone, or I'll have my phone privileges taken away. This is not a great way though unless I have a few more minutes to amuse myself, because they always ALWAYS want to know why this has happened and how old I am. anyway . . .

Say "No" over and over. Be sure to vary the sound of each one, and keep a rhythmic tempo, even as they are trying to speak. This is most fun if you can do it until they hang up. This is also something that you can just set the phone down on the desk and do and continue working on something else till they hand up.

If ATT calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family and Friends Plan, reply, in as sinister a voice as you can, "I don't have any friends, would you be my friend?" Or for added effect say. . . my friends have all had their phone numbers unlisted so that I can't call them anymore . . . Would you let me call you tonight? Please.. See above about PLEASE.

If the company cleans rugs, respond: "Can you get out blood? Can you get out goat blood? How about human blood?"

After the Telemarketer gives his or her spiel, I ask him or her if they are married. Then tell them that I am not married. But I want to be. Do they? Would they consider me? etc. Then see "Begging" above.

When they get all flustered, tell them that you can't just give your credit card number to a complete stranger. Tell them that you want to play a game. They guess the first number. You'll tell them its a number between say 3 and 7. If they guess correctly you'll give them the next number, but if they guess incorrectly, you'll hang up immediately. Of course, they are always wrong and you can hang right up. But "if" you want to draw it out, let them get it right all the way down to the last number THEN hang up. I like this "if" I have the time. It really gets their hopes up.

Tell the Telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask him/her if she will give you her home phone number so you can call her back. When the Telemarketer explains that telemarketers cannot give out their home numbers say, "I guess you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The Telemarketer will agree and you say, "Me either!" Hang up. I only do this if I'm wanting to be amused and a rude feeling has suddenly swept over me. They have NEVER called back after this line. This is really a rude response though

Tell them it is lunch time, but ask if they would please hold. Put them on your speaker phone while you continue to eat at your desk at liesure. I smack my food loudly and continue talking to employees if they come in. Sometime you can hear them on the other end yelling out loud trying to get my attention back. Usually they hang up after a minute. But they will call back after this one, so you will have to go to one of the other options.

Tell the Telemarketer you are on "home incarceration" and ask if they could bring you some beer. Again, explain about being under constant adult supervision. See above.

I tell the Telemarketer, "Okay, I'll listen to you. But I should probably tell you, I'm not wearing any underwear. Are you? What color? etc. get very personal. whatever they say ask something personal. Do you use Viagra, etc. ." This is rude though so I don't like to do it.

I insist that the caller is really my friend Jerry playing a joke. "Come on, Jerry, cut it out! Seriously, Jerry, stop it. Jerry, you think I'm stupid. You can't fool me with that effiminate voice" etc.

I tell them I am hard of hearing and that they need to speak up . . . louder . . . louder . . . an I hold the phone away from my mouth so they can not make out clearly what I'm saying. Or I just set the phone down on the desk and go on talking jibberish softly. So they know I'm still there, but can't tell what I'm saying. No one has ever called back after this one.

Tell them to talk very slowly, because you want to write every word down. I keep saying . . . Can you spell that? Can you repeat that? Interject personal questions about their mother or childhood.

That's my list so far. As I think of others I'll let you know. Two of these are rude and should only be done very infrequently or you will become a rude person. If you have some that have worked for you, please leave me a commnent.

Andy Rooney's Point of View and Mine too!!

I liked Andy Rooney's comments on 60 minutes. We share some of the same ideas. Mine are included:

I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some governmental stooge with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to crack addicts for squirting out babies or people with a paint brush and canvas that think a picture of Jesus urinating, is art! I don't want my tax money used for education to teach children which person to throw out of the lifeboat.

Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.

I believe they are called the Boy Scouts for a reason, that is why there are no girls allowed. Girls belong in the Girl Scouts!

I don't think being a minority makes you a victim of anything except numbers.

I have the right "NOT" to be tolerant of others because they are different, weird, or tick me off.

I know what sex is, and there are not varying degrees of it. If I received sex from one of my subordinates in my office, it wouldn't be a private matter or my personal business. I would be "FIRED" immediately!

I believe that if you are selling me a milk shake, a pack of cigarettes, a newspaper or a hotel room, you must do it in English! As a matter fact, if you want to be an American citizen, you should have to speak English!

I think the police should have every right to shoot your sorry self if you threaten them after they tell you to stop. If you can't understand the word "freeze"or "stop" in English, see the above lines.

I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor. I know pro wrestling is fake, but so are movies and television. That doesn't stop you from watching them. I believe a self-righteous liberal or conservative with a cause is more dangerous than a Hell's Angel with an attitude.

I think Bill Gates has every right to keep every penny he made and continue to make more. If it ticks you off, go and invent the next operating system that's better, and put your name on the building.

It doesn't take a whole village to raise a child right, but it does take a parent to stand up to the kid: and smack their little behinds when necessary, and say "NO!"

I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please don't pretend they are a political statement. And, please, stay home until that new lip ring heals. I don't want to look at your ugly infected mouth as you serve me french fries!